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  1. #1
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    HILARIOUS - 50 Reasons Why Texas Sucks

    1. Texans. Socially retarded acts of bravado. Lack of self awareness. Isolationistic in thought. Kind of like someone who was raised under a rock, but the rock was big, so they boast about how big the rock was.
    There's more, but, man, it's so sad - and they don't even know it!
    2. Texas politics. I am a conservative who votes republican. Texans are rednecks who vote republican. should I buy an "I'm with stupid" T-shirt?
    3. Tx is a Mexican border state. Complete with roads traveled by drug cartels feeding the increasing violent crime rate, drug use, and ever expanding prison population in Tx. That isn't nice and I don't have this problem in my state.
    4. Is EVERYONE in Tx chewing tobacco??
    5. Leading state for hate groups. There are more known hate
    groups in tx then any other state. They all hate different groups for different reasons. When you get right down to it, no one is safe in tx - not even texans. Testament to tx long tradition of nice, down to earth, clan members and level-headed cult fanatics.
    6. There are Two seasons in Tx, hot and hotter. There is a third if
    you count the hurricane season. A fourth if you count squirrel
    season.
    7. Texas' branding of Tex-mex. Uh, we all know it's just Mexican.
    Maybe Kansas should capitalize on Cantonese food and call it
    Kan-Can. It's catchier, and doesn't sound like a gas station when
    you say it.
    8. Over industrialization of undesirable industries. Yes, when you visit tx, you get the full impact of what a cesspool they've made out of their state with factories, oil refineries, and chemical plants. Don't get me wrong, it is good somebody is manufacturing this stuff out there, but, man, you've got to be six flags short of a theme park to live amongst the stench-filled, chemical run-off, heat-fest that is tx.
    9. Texas as a state ranks in the top 5 of all states for all major
    pollutants. Go figure. The EPA says you can't breathe the air for fear of carcinogens, can't drink the water for fear of toxins, can't eat the seafood for fear of mercury poisoning, and the Taiwanese plants spill high levels of run-off into the neighborhoods. That isn't good either!
    10. "Clampet" stereotypes which aren't all together untrue. I've never seen any other collective bunch unwittingly living up to negative stereotypes. Perhaps some t-shirts can be air dropped to them. You know, t-shirts that say something like, "thank god i struck oil, cuz my double-wide needs a fixin"
    11. Texan's general confusion between pride and reason. there is a healthy pride, and then there is a texan pride. actually, a texan is proud of his state like a branch davidian is proud of his cool-aid.
    12. "DON'T MESS WITH TEXAS". Why would I need to mess with
    Texas when it's already messed up? What's wrong with the old standby: Yeeeeeeehaw!!!!..and other inane slogans that demonstrate
    an inability to articulate one's self.
    13. Corrupt institutions of business. Enron was a great. But, no one can beat the oil companies for blood money, environmental destruction, greed, and corruption. a texan would tell you that corruption only exists in zip codes outside their magical state. is this true?
    14. Cults and fundamentalists. Kind of self explanatory. Apparently, tx is the perfect place for those who like to organize and be
    merry while preying on kids. Gotta love tx.
    15. Backwards thinking. State first? Country second, or is there
    something between state and country like, i don't know, socks or
    peanut butter? You gotta love state first mentality. If the country is attacked, would tx try to side with mexico just to save their own state? Kind of like, if the house was burning, you'd only save your favorite bathroom. Lots of reasoning there. wait a minute! i'm going to start a new one. it's called home owners association first! Hey tx, do you shoot people in the back too? Buncha anti-american secessionist quitters! just kidding, only 20% of you are the American Taliban.
    16. Worst humidity and dew point. Yes it is true. Houston/bay area is tied with annual averages for the worst humidity and dew point in the united states per NOAA. In a nutshell, it's like a sauna. a constant sauna for 7 months out of the year. so is hell.
    17. Hurricanes. you got it. more of my tax dollars go to natural
    disasters like hurricanes in tx. nothing like every hurricane season fearing the wrath of god upon your family and home.
    18. Tornadoes. this must have to do with the fact that tx leads the nation in the amount of trailor homes as a percentage of all homes. the good thing is, tx is flat and has nothing around for 100's of miles. so, not many people should get hurt except those who ask for it. you know, texans.
    19. Trailer trash. "T" stands for trailor trash, tornadoes, truck
    stops, terrible, tacky, terrorist, taliban, travesty, and one
    more...uh...dang, i forgot.
    20. Prison over population. tx just can't kill 'em fast enough.
    21. Gun rights. Hey look, texans need their guns because the state is unwilling foot the bill for adequate policing and safety like other
    states. state first! citizen last!
    22. Highest unwanted teen pregnancies. According to a Houston paper, they like to do more than play with barbies down in tx. Apparently they like to get pregnant and be a mom at age 12 too.
    23. Poorly educated. STILL poorly educated compared to other states. when are the oil guys going to pay for schools.
    24. Lack of affluence. This is something oil money cannot buy. you can be rich, but you can't find Oklahoma on a map.
    25. Cities annex neighboring towns just to boast on size. truly texas. guess what, everyone can see thru this. when your metro area is a 10th the size of other metro areas, you kind of get the idea your just
    being typical tx.
    26. Highest accident rate of any state. Listen, you have to drive 2 hours to get to what places the rest of us can get to in 30 minutes. I would drive fast and not care about my life too if I lived in texas. of course, the accident rate also includes factory explosions, etc.
    27. Texas consumes more energy than what is produced by the state in terms of gross product per the dept of energy. texas is an energy empire. unfortunately, their bragging is unsubstantiated when they claim the power the world.
    28. highest in-sourcer (more people working for foreign firms -
    helping make $ in foreign investments). guess what, more citizens in
    tx by percentage aren't contributing a dime to u.s. investment.
    29. High cancer rate. of course. you don't roil your state with
    anything goes industry without paying for it do you?
    30. High obesity rate - must be the dependence on mexican food, bbq. That's Mexian food, you know, it's what makes tx so exotic.
    31. Rated one of the 'least livable' of all states in 2008. It's just
    an article. but it was nice.
    32. Floods. It is wonderful how tx is famous for its natural
    disasters. Stevie Ray Vaughn sang about it. He's a texan, i like
    Stevie ray Vaughn, and if i lived in texas I'd sing the blues too.
    he's just telling it like it is.
    33. Lack of water to most of the state, high cost of water. Are you kidding? you can't drink oil?
    34. Toxic levels of mercury in fishing off texas shore. Already
    covered. I like eating thermometers. maybe i should move to tx.
    35. No mountains. Tx is beautiful with flat dusty fields of dry dirt
    for 100's of miles until you get to some hills with nice folks with
    guns. tx. great place to drive thru on your way to somewhere else.
    36. Beaches are contaminated. Galveston is called a resort town.
    compared to my state, galveston is a cesspool with an oil platform right on the beach while you swim among signs that warn you about hepatitis.
    37. 4 out of the 10 fattest cities in America just happen to reside in Texas. Now, we all know that Texas toast is so dang tasty, but slather on some bbq sauce and top it off with a block of lard and you got you there an o'fficial Tx-sized snack for the kids!
    38. Pronounced pride and prejudice. back on the pride kick. can't have pride without prejudiced. oh wait, i can.
    39. Nice people - to your face. The rest is some kind of judgment call made on their own arcane beliefs.
    40. American history, or lack there of. First Tx wanted nothing more than to be annexed by the U.S., once it was ratified in, then it wanted out, then it barely contributed to the confederate forces in the civil war! Is Tx acting like a bipolar adolescent who just found out he was adopted, or just too hopped up on peyote?
    41. Nasty critters. Fire ants, Africanized bees, scorpions, etc.
    42. Texas flag. Ok, now, what flag does the Tx flag look like if you
    stare at it a long time (.01 seconds)? Give you a hint: It was designed nearly 70 years before U.S. citizens declared Tx sovereign! Where is the originality? Did Texans burn up all their creativity when they coined "Tex-Mex"?
    43. The rankings among the states: Percentage of Uninsured
    Children-50th, Percentage of Population without Health Insurance-50th, Scholastic Assessment Test (SAT) Scores-47th, Percentage of Population over 25 with a High School diploma-50th, Percentage of Non-Elderly Women with Health Insurance-50th, Rate of Women Aged 40+ Who Receive
    Mammograms-44th, Rate of Women Aged 18+ Who Receive Pap
    Smears-47th, Cervical Cancer Rate-5th in the nation, Women's Voter Registration-43rd, Women's Voter Turnout-49th, Percentage of Eligible Voters that Vote-44th. Texas, please change your name to New Iran.

  2. #2
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    Re: HILARIOUS - 50 Reasons Why Texas Sucks

    ...here's the rest...

    44. Lost perspective of their country. I guess if your trapped in an abyss, you lose all hope that there is more out there.
    45. Texas tea smells like wafting B.O., a sulfur pit, and a manure
    farm. oh wait, tx oil towns are right next to sulfer pits which are
    right next to ranches. that leave's B.O., which is the illegal
    immigrant day laborer who has to work illegally at all these places in order to make ends meet.
    46. BIG Hair. This is what they mean when they say everything is bigger in Tx.
    47. dallas cowboys. greatest NFL expansion team to ever bandwagon on (if your in to that kind of thing)..even though they haven't been to a superbowl in 15 years.
    48. Propaganda. Texans love to embellish the truth and distort the facts in attempts to sell their state to us. must be easier for them than having to do any of that pesky research or providing boring factual substantiation. Once they realize we know better, they tend to get louder and more aggressive - kind of like a silverback gorilla when threatened by poachers.
    49. Income Inequality Between the Rich and the Poor- Sate ranking: 49th. Hmmm, 13 billionaires and 15 million low income earners. We've come a long way as Americans...except for tx who is just now building pyramids for their oil pharaohs.
    50. Sports are competitive. That's why academics aren't. Luckily they're close to country where they can get cheap anabolic steroids and other enhancement drugs you cant buy in the u.s.

  3. #3
    PWCToday's first Tigershark owner Moderator
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    Re: HILARIOUS - 50 Reasons Why Texas Sucks

    but with 14 'reasons' more than the other thread.
    My quote for the week of 03-February-2013 to 09-February-2013: "time to hang up the skates"
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  4. #4
    PWCToday.com Is My Home Away From Home tfergusonracing's Avatar
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    Re: HILARIOUS - 50 Reasons Why Texas Sucks

    For your first post?!?
    It takes a big man to admit when he's wrong. I am not a big man.


  5. #5
    resident guru RumRunner_1492's Avatar
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    Re: HILARIOUS - 50 Reasons Why Texas Sucks

    I smell someone creating another account just to be a troll. I have my money on who it is. Don't feed the troll.

  6. #6
    PWCToday.com Is My Home Away From Home 'Crockett's Avatar
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    Re: HILARIOUS - 50 Reasons Why Texas Sucks

    Quote Originally Posted by RumRunner_1492 View Post
    I smell someone creating another account just to be a troll. I have my money on who it is. Don't feed the troll.

    That's a Ban-able offence. . . . . . . be funny if he gets popped on it.If it's who I think it might be, he doesn't contribuite anything here anyway . . . . . . . .





  7. #7
    Norge PWCToday.com Is My Home Away From Home R Hudson's Avatar
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    Re: HILARIOUS - 50 Reasons Why Texas Sucks

    C'mon guys!

    I do contribute something here

  8. #8
    PWCToday Guru rdethrow's Avatar
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    Re: HILARIOUS - 50 Reasons Why Texas Sucks

    Texas still sucks.......hey rummy why don't we find out who might be setting up the dual acct. Here???? All they need to do is run the IP address and find out who it is. What's really going to be funny to see if it is you or one of your pals here trying to pull a fast one!!!!!!!!

    I think the real troll is in the right wing woodshed!!!! Could be Yoyamma???? Obama has turned him against Texas?
    Last edited by rdethrow; 09-23-2009 at 10:35 PM.

  9. #9
    PWCToday.com Is My Home Away From Home 1tommygunner1927's Avatar
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    Re: HILARIOUS - 50 Reasons Why Texas Sucks

    Census Bureau statistics show that fewer Americans are uprooting. And when they do move, they're favoring D.C., Alaska and Texas.

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